Thursday, October 4, 2012

The End of the Twins' Tsuyoshi Nishioka Era—With An Interesting Twist

Said blog post has been moved to SB Nation's Twinkie Town. Read it here.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012


You may have noticed I haven't been posting here as much this year, for which apologize.

However, I do post at Twinkie Town at least a couple times a week. So if you really miss me, I suggest checking Twinkie Town out (especially because of the other super talented writers there). I do plan to keep posting here periodically, but my writing will be more spread out between here and Twinkie Town.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

2012 Twins Opening Home-Stand: How About That Josh Willingham?

The Twins have completed their first home-stand of the season, winning 2 out of 6, and ultimately leaving them 2 for 9 on the season total. Accordingly, hence, we can say the Twins suckexcept for Josh Willingham.

JOSH WILLINGHAM. Josh Willingham has quickly catapulted himself to the front of my "Favorite Current Twins List." He's already hit FOUR HOMERUNSFOURnot to mention, three AT Target Field (eat it Cuddy [omg jk we luv u]). He's been, by far, the biggest offensive stand-out thus far for the Twins.

Which is funnybecause you know how I used to sit often on the first baseline? Yeahnow I sit in left field. And I love it! I love left field! Like last Thursday, when Josh hit a homerun right into the flowers in front of me and I watched all these older guys dog-pile in front of me for the ball, but then I was the one on sports center for some reason. We did a number to those flowers.

I was told by the guy who eventually found the ball that it was about 6 inches in the bowl−hence the dig.

(Me, upper right-hand corner, officiating all this or something)

Today (Sunday−Jackie Robinson Day) was also pretty cool when I noticed Josh Willingham had ripped a huge hole in his pants.


Home-Stand Food

One of my favorite parts of getting back to the ballpark is ballpark food (because I'm kinda a fatty, represent!). Out of the new food items presented this year, the Buffalo Chicken Mac 'n' Cheese seemed to be the most anticipated. It was for me! So here's my official review:

The Buffalo Chicken Mac 'n' Cheese is good, but EXTREMELY overpriced. Imagine paying $10 for a bowl of easy mac with extra topings. Ok? This tiny bowl of Mac 'n' Cheese is $10.75.

Not worth it.

Other New Additions to Target Field

I haven't been all around the ball park, but what I've noticed is new:
  • A bronze statue of Kent Hrbek has been added outside Gate 14 (No, it does not include Ron Gant, as many multiple 'jokesters' on Twitter asked).
  • The lime stone engraving of "Target Field" behind home plate has been moved slightly towards left field (thank god, right?)
  • There is NOOO SMOKING AT TARGET FIELD. For reals now. There is not even a smoking section by Gate 6. No smoking. None. NOOOOOOO Smoking. (Rest in Peace Bob Casey).
  • Best Additions: A picture of a cancer ribbon hugging the state of Minnesota in right field, along with a large ad for "StandUp2Cancer"Harmon Killebrew's favorite charityin the right field second deck.

  • LIVE MASCOT RACE: Remember the between-innings video race on the jumbotron amongst the blue ox, loon, mosquito, Target Dog, and fish? Yeah−now they have mascot costumes for all and do a live race. It's awesome. I will probably grow tired of it after awhile, but I know yesterday I laughed my ass off every time the Target Dog fell on its face (because it happened like five times).

Public Service Announcement